Your swinging lifestyle questions answered.
These answers are our interpretation of the lifestyle. We hold a liberal view.
We will do our best to answer your questions fully, we will say when we do not know the answer.
You may submit your questions using email, or a message via WhatsApp or Telegram
You may also contact us with a more detailed answer if you feel we have provided an incomplete answer to someone's question.
What is Swinging?
We have developed the answer to this question into a full page, What is Swinging?
We have developed the answer to this question into a full page. Who Swings?
We have developed the answer to this question into a full page. Why Do People Swing?
What are the risks in swinging?
We have developed the answer to this question into a full page. Risks of Swinging
We have been told that in a club you have to have sex with anyone who asks. Is this true?
In the swinging scene the rules are that you only have sex with people YOU want to have sex with. You have the right to say no to any person at any time. No always means NO.
If a person continues to have sex with you after you say no - this would be rape. If a person continues to touch you after you say no this is a seriou sexual assault.
If you have any such problem call out for help, anyone nearby will come to your rescue and most hosts will exclude and ban the offender.
I am a straight girl, I have been told that all women swingers are bi-sexual. Is this true?
No, not yet!
No, a high percentage of women in the swinging scene are bi-sexual. The current numbers are about 75% of female profiles list the woman as bi-sexual or bi-curious.
We are in our 20's, we want fun with people our age but have been told that swingers are all old. Is this true?
Not at all. The ages of swingers range from 18 through to people in their 70's (maybe older).
Before you go to a club or a party ask the hosts what the expected or usual age range is for the event you are considering attending.
Look for events listed for 18-30's or 18-40's. We have tried running events for these age ranges, but they tend not to be well attended, the majority of couples (even the young ones) seem to enjoy the wider choice of partners offered at an "All ages welcome" party.
Remember you never have to play with anyone at a party, you always have the right to say NO.
What are the age limits in Swinging?
Please read the page What are the age limits in Swinging?
I am a bi-curious male. I have been told that swingers do not like bi-males. Is this true?
We have developed the answer to this question into a full page. Bi Sexual Swingers
There are so many words in people adverts that I do not understand, what do they all mean?
We have developed the answer to this question into a full page. Swinging Terminology
I am a single male in my 40's, I have written to loads of women and couples and never had a single reply, are there any real swingers?.
I started as a single male in the swinging scene when I was 18. I wrote dozens of letters to swingers contact magazines before I met my first 2 couples. It took over 6 months to get my first meeting.
When I got divorced in 1998, I was back in the scene as a single man again. now in my 40's I thought I would never get anywhere. I wrote to any single women who sounded like they were looking for a guy like me, then I wrote to all the couples. I made sure I was what they were advertising for.
People have to be attracted to you before they respond. The letter you send is important, the pictures you send are important, your attitude is important.
Perseverance is important, don't start putting comments in your ads about there being nobody real. Keep a positive attitude, but don't be cocky. Have a look at my page about Single Males in the swinging scene. Follow this link.
Do I have to be naked at a swingers club?
Not usually, this depends upon the club rules and the rules of any special events that a club or party may be running.
Usually you will be allowed to wear smart clothes, or lingerie, or a towel, or swim wear.
I am a lady size 20, will I fit in?
Sure you will, there is a huge demand for BBW's in the swinging scene. Just make it clear in your ad that you are a larger lady and be honest about yourself and you will have fun.
What should I wear to a swingers party?
Read the invitation or website for some clues. A beach party would suggest wearing a bikini/swim suit. A Hawaiian party suggests a loud shirt, coconut bikini's and grass skirts, A toga party suggests spending a few minutes creating a toga. However if no dress code is given dress in smart casual clothes. (men: avoid jeans, shorts, track suits) wear nice underwear underneath, if the party looks like its a lingerie party you can easily shed your outer wear.
Most parties are either smart casual or lingerie, some allow full nudity, some demand the wearing of a towel in public areas.
How do I persuade my partner to attend a party?
You don't. Pushing or pulling a reluctant partner into the swinging scene does not work and will probably bring about the early end of your relationship.
Talk to your partner about what you would like to do. If they are not interested, then swinging is not going to be a part of your relationship.
Taking an unaware partner to a swingers party will lead to problems, probably arguments and prossible termination of your relationship.
I have seen people advertising that they are a cuckold couple and the hotwife is looking for a bull. What does this mean?
Have a look at the page What is Cuckolding for the answers to this question.
Isn't Swinging just another name for prostitution?
Absolutely not. Swinging And Prostitution Are Very Different And Not Compatible. Read this for more details